beach time!

today, erika and i took the day off from work and went on a little adventure to singing beach. we took the commuter rail and got off at manchester by the sea, then 'followed the crowd' to the beach! it really is a nice beach, and the sand more squeaks than sings. but it certainly is novel. we went to the 'other' end of the beach where there was more space than people, and i got pretty sunburned.

i think next time we'll bring more ladies and an umbrella and maybe a nice little picnic with fresh mozzarella, basil, and tomatoes. maybe some pasta salad...

fortunately we remembered my polaroid big swinger camera, and took old timey beach pictures.

there were some super, super nice houses out there - they even had a bandstand in the commons; it seemed like a really pretty yet potentially weird place to live. too perfect? i guess i can just imagine living there and being trapped.

everyone on the beach was so tanned and toned and perfect looking. it's only within the last few years that i've felt so self-conscious at the beach.

but here's something weird: i've never wished i had a tan before, and i did on friday. this person i dated recently...i'm not really his type, i don't think. he talks about liking pretty little blondes who go to the beach and hang out on the vineyard and nantucket. and god; i've always been so confident in myself. and for the first time in a long time, i thought maybe things would have been different if i'd been different - more normal? it's not a 'real wish' - i don't think there's any logic, or that things would have actually worked. but it's just this nagging little thing inside of me that i can't seem to shake.