7.14.2005

tales from the flag store...

huge rack o' flagsso i have now been here three weeks at the flag store. i manage the retail section, deal with the customers, and do general administrative work. all told, i have probably sold almost $10,000 worth of flags. that's a lot of flags. and i have learned a lot here, some useful, most not so useful. dealing with the people is interesting. some samplings of conversation from the shop:


customer: "am i going to get arrested if i fly only a state flag and a corporate flag, but no U. S. flag? I hear there are laws about that"
answer: no. while it is considered poor etiquette, it is certainly not illegal.

customer: "my flag has been up for only two years and it's starting to fray. is that the average life expectancy of a flag?"
answer: no. the government states that the average life expectancy of an outdoor flag is 90 days. that's 90 days assuming that you treat it correctly by taking it down every night and during inclement weather. if you don't do those things, the life expectancy is shorter. if you got 2.5 years out of your flag, it's a miracle.

customer: "my neighbor has a really tattered flag flying in his front yard. it's a disgrace! can i call the cops on him?"
answer: no. the cops don't care. there are, however, civic organizations that will go harass the flag owner for you.

customer: "it's fucking disgusting that you carry the iraq flag! anybody who buys that piece of shit for anything other than burning it should be fucking arrested!"
answer: ~silence~


it's like that all day around here. weird flag questions, which i have now learned the answers to. i think the rest of casa highland might be getting a wee bit sick of my flag knowledge...

7 comments:

Mom said...

Some day, in some way, this knowledge will be useful...

Pandora said...

So, it sounds to me like you spend your day selling flags to people that seriously need a hobby.

wonder_girl said...

When my husband tries to become a citizen, that knowledge will be useful!!

See, Moms are always right.....

smothra said...

Pandora - I think you misunderestimate the lure of flags as a hobby in and of themselves. Doubtless these fine flag store wares will be antiques themselves some day. Although the ninety-day lifespan doesn't say much for modern manufacturing methods.

Oh, and hi, Kate. I got your email and I am now reading the blog. I have to say I'm somewhat inspired to produce a "Casa Sock-Monkey" although I have no stories to tell about timed competitive urination. Yet.

Pandora said...

Well, I suppose it's a better hobby than collecting belly button lint.

bandit said...

TMI!!!!

pandora, i *don't* want to know what you do with your belly button lint!

Pandora said...

Oh, that's because I don't have any. VI is always trying to give me his, though, so if I wanted to collect it I'd have enough to stuff a pillow with.