7.25.2006

the Dove Foundation called me tonight...

i normally don't answer my phone, but for some reason when the state of Michigan called me, i decided to pick up. only it wasn't Michigan. it was The Dove Foundation, a non-profit dedicated to family decency in films and television. they said they had a short survey that would take less than 90 seconds, and asked me if i would participate. i was feeling generous, so why not. here's the transcript of the call, to the best of my recollection:

DF: decent, good, kind people are concerned about the morality of television and movies going down the toilet, and are worried that the average american can't do anything to fix it. do you agree that the content of television and movies is often objectionable?

me: i don't think there is enough obscenity on television.

DF: what?

me: there should be more obscenity on tv.

DF: "click"

that's right. it all took less than 90 seconds because they hung up on me. so if you are reading over their survey results (which they swear are "unquestionably accurate and without prejudice") and wondering how middle america is feeling about decency on tv, the honest answer is -- no one knows. they hang up on folks who don't agree.

so to level the playing field, here's what i suggest. if you feel as though their research methods are shoddy, please take this survey. you don't have to tell them you want to see more tits and ass on tv, but you should tell them your opinion in a way that will be more of a pain in the ass for them to delete from the database.

15 comments:

Mark said...

Well, I guess that's one way of dealing with opposing opinions.

marshall said...

Well, I looked at the website (and took the poll-- to help them achieve their ambition of mounting one of the most ambitious consuerm surveys in history. You know I love history and being a part of it!). I also looked at their board of directors and I see that Doctor Laura is on there, as is Lisa Whelchel. Remember her? She played Blair, the sexed-up boarding school girl on "Facts of Life" in the 80's. Of course, she is more recently famous for mounting a national campaign to advocate for "hot-saucing", the practice of disciplining your children by forcing them to take a shot of Tabasco (or a similarly spicy condiment) when they are bad. Find out more at lisawhelchel.com!

Pandora said...

Nothing like a nicely biased push poll to generate socially irrelevant statistics!

hot saucing?? I hate that show even more now.

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Anonymous said...

Did the caller start the interview by asking for the "lady of the house"? The reason I am asking is that the Dove Foundation has been using an IVR (interactive voice response) system to call people and line up suckers to be called by a for-profit company selling family-oriented entertainment. Of course this whole charade is to get around the "Do Not Call" law. Hangups are common with their IVR system (a computer, robot, call it what you will). It is like talking to a drunk. Do a google search for "dove foundation" and "do not call".

bandit said...

nope, this was a live person calling (a lady!) and not a robot. she also, probably wisely, didn't ask for the lady of the house. such requests generally either get laughed at, hung up on, or get some smart ass comment from me about gender rolls. it's the twenty-first century. there is no lady of the house here. there are, however, a bunch of women and a few too many cats. maybe next time i'll put trixie on the line.

scoutie said...

wait...

you mean i'm not the lady of the house?!?

so should i stop referring to you as my dear husband...?

bandit said...

hey scoutie...! ladies do not wind up in hot tubs on cape cod. i repeat -- there are no ladies here.

Pandora said...

"gender rolls"?? Are you calling me fat???

Anonymous said...

They seem to have taken the survey down - how upsetting.

Anonymous said...

Some progress on Dove Foundation: see Missouri Attorney General Jay Nixon's website for details on how he got a settlement agreement with Dove Foundation to abide by the Do Not Call list when calling Missouri residents. It cost Dove $70,000 as well. Details are in the AG's News Archives for August, 2006.

Anonymous said...

Here is the current url for their survey
http://www.dove.org/opinionpoll_takeit.asp

Marje said...

I was receiving up to 8 calls a day from this 800 number. When I googled it, I found out it was the Dove Foundation. I went to their site and clicked on the contact us link. I sent them a quick note and told them to immediately remove my phone number from their call list. I haven't received any more calls from them.

Anonymous said...

We just got this call, I found you via Google trying to figure out wtf this Dove Foundation was.. Listened to the spiel, and the question was at least triple the length you remembered. At the end, all that came to mind to say was "Nice push polling"

Response: *pause* ... "Thank you." *CLICK*

I guess that's another one that won't end up in the survey. But I would've bet money Brent Bozell was involved..

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